I have raised the same question in one of my previous posts too. It is a question that has made me think a lot. It is something that has been eating my head for a long time now. It is this:
"Is the feeling of vengence wrong? Is it wrong to try taking revenge?"
To most of you, it would be a very stupid question. It would come out of the blue - specially from a pacifist like me (trust me, I am one) Anyways, from what I have seen so far - what we sow is what we reap, there is no other way around it.
Someone did something bad to you - they betrayed you, back-stabbed about you, hurt you, anything... Is it right to do something bad to them in return when you get a chance to prove your superiority? Or is it better to just forgive and forget and let God do the rest?
I want your comments on this.
big deal!!! forget it n move on....
ReplyDeleteBut kiya, there are things you can never forget... But anyways, knowing you, you'd move on faster than most people!!! That, I think, is being passive to whatever happens not just around you, but to you as well. You gotta act, do something, least of all, talk to your closest buddy about it...
ReplyDeleteThe feeling of doing a reciprocate action will come at the time of the incident happened .
ReplyDeleteIf we get a chance , we will certainly do, whatever we can, in a mild manner. The action may be 'not to speak them or avoiding them etc ..
But over the period, we will forget what happened to us and we move on.
we are not saints.But we are trying to be the one.
But Karthi, my question is, "Will you ruin someone who hurt you, if you get a chance to do so?"
ReplyDeleteSomeone hurt you so badly and you get a chance to hurt them back again, will you go for it or will you stay calm and say, "God will teach him/her a lesson. Why should I ruin him/her?"
Looks like you're very deeply impressed by your granny's bed time stories San... God will punish…, god will show the way…, god will do this…, god will do that… are all crap.... What has to be done has to be done by you, the life is yours, it’s your decision that would make the difference and I only hope you aren't taking suggestions from us... Cause, this is something that varies from people to people, state/ situation to situation and some may react in a simple manner, but some may give serious blow backs. So I aint commenting a conclusion, I would just say... "Go ahead, do what your mind says at that point of time... let the happening happen, and face it”. Trust me; you’ll have hell a lotta fun…
ReplyDeleteHey... Good question., I've got 2 answers for this..
ReplyDeletea) 2 for an Eye is what the world follows, nothing wrong in you following "An Eye for an Eye"
b) FnF.. Forgive and Forget
forgive but dont forget ..that's my way.
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ReplyDeletehi!
ReplyDeletethough idealistic ,though it is too good to be true, the most appropriate way is to forgive !
Why? ......I believe in Karma, if some one does something bad to you, that person may gain something materially but that lasts only momentary.He doesn't know that he is accruing a lot of bad stuff( say negative energy/stuff.. to keep it simple.), and being at the receiving side you end up paying for ur bad deeds.So its just a win win situation for u.
It is very difficult to forgive ppl , i know ! One way to forgive ppl , is to have your heart filled with a lot of compassion. This compassion will help you buffer up your emotions and let you behave in a more cool way.
:)
Wow, thanks for so many beautiful insights sal, dhinu, karthi, arun and anand... I believe in Newton's 3rd law completely... Every action has an equal and opposite reaction.
ReplyDeleteU forgive someone today, there'll be a time when u commit a mistake(no1 is flawless, as it is) there'll be someone who'd choose to forgive you... And from my own experience, whatever mistakes I commit, I get proper punishment (no, not from the people I hurt), but from somewhere else. I prefer to call this "somewhere else" God. People have different names for it... Fate, Karma... God sounds simpler to me!
Hey sandy, FYI.. I'VE 4GIVEN YOU. If you dont know what did i forgive you for, you've been forgiven for saying least a 100 lies/day, that you're cute.
ReplyDeleteSandhya,
ReplyDeleteThat's a nice thought provoking post.Well....if it is me Hmmmm I frankly agree that I do give them a fitting reply and the very next second I do repent too.As they say "It's a murky world" and that too in the Corporate World one needs to be bold enough to survive.
Nice post :-)
Have a nice day,
K.Kiran.
Well if someone hurts you it just means that that person is very much part of your life,not every 3rd person in your life can hurt you.
ReplyDeleteAnd you got hurt just because that person meant a lot to you and you never expected this from him.
Will you ever want to hurt back someone who meant a lot you??
I wouldn't suggest that any day Sandy,keep going but when the time comes just try making that friend of yours understand the fact that he meant a lot to you.That would be the best thing you can do.
And thanks a lot for taking your time and reading my blog,its always a pleasure to see a techie in spite of your busy schedule(the last post of yours didn't establish this though :P) taking time to read my blog.Thanks mate!!!
Well, when someone has already hurt you, there is no point in going out to them and reasoning with them because that would only make you look more vulnerable and chances are you'd get more hurt (ppl really jus love hurting others when they're already down and depressed)...
ReplyDeleteAnyways, I am not a techie (I jus finished my comp. engg., that doesn't make me a techie, does it?) I wanna become a HR personnel as I love interacting (by this I mean talking and chatting) with people... So please don't ever call me a techie (all other techies would feel insulted ;-P)
Lolz...vengeance?? Vengeance is for cheap, sensitive folk.
ReplyDeleteThe worst thing you can do to some one who tried to hurt you is to be:
1. Happy.
2. Pick up something immensely positive from the incident.
Now that'll piss them off. And if you like you could go up to them and say (in private, since we're 'classy' people)
'Thanks for trying to screw me over. I know it was you, and I could screw you back, but that would mean we're the same. But thanks to you I have become a better person, so your pathetic attempt at making me miserable has failed. Oh...and if you're not too busy, please go f@ck yourself!'
That usually works. A schemer likes nothing less than embarassment. And if it's done in private, you're not being vindictive. [:D]
That being said, I believe our relationship is strong enough, so you forgive me for whatever I've done, and I won't get a call spouting my lines straight back at me... [:P]
'Thanks for trying to screw me over. I know it was you, and I could screw you back, but that would mean we're the same. But thanks to you I have become a better person, so your pathetic attempt at making me miserable has failed. Oh...and if you're not too busy, please go f@ck yourself!'
ReplyDeleteWow... I'd love to say those words to some people. But as I said, I am a pacifist and I just leave it to God to make them realise on their own...
Hi Sandhya..I ve come across ur blog the other day.. This post of urs was quite a debatable one.Revenge or Pardon.... I feel the correct one to judge this is one's own self.I too have experienced those betrayals and back stabbings(in a small scale though).Everytime i face such a situation , the first thing is i introspect myself and try to find out was there any fault of mine?? Aftr making sure that i ve no reason to regret i just move on ignoring those ppl(though i ll ve to maintain frenly gestures in case they r my frns or some1 whom i ve to meet regularly).I just move on with my work,( though i do feel sometimes that i need to take revenge).
ReplyDeleteIn a nutshell i feel you should look into his past life and the closeness he/she shares with u and forgive the person (obviously with an explanation from him). If that person ignores u and has no feeling of regret itz better to stop communicating with him/her n move on. But u shud be really careful in these matters and know where to draw the line.
Excuse me, if there is anything wrong in my words.Frankly speaking even i too never knew how to react when i came across such situations..